Another Kind of Mommy Brain

Eli Tzvi - 8 months

Ziona Sofia - 6 months

These are my older kids when they were little babies, and I honestly do not remember them at this stage.  Thank God for pictures!  I also cannot imagine my baby Matisyahu as a big boy, its crazy how with our children we are naturally completely present.  When I was pregnant with Matisyahu, I was looking at other moms with little babies thinking, wow that will be me soon.  I really am reliving each day, week, and month anew with my brand new little boy.  It is amazing how our brains forget, because as they say, all we really have is now.  All the calendars, time lines, history are stories, but living is NOW.

Even with bearing children, everyone has their own individual experiences.  For some women the Pregnancy is wonderful, for others nausea and other symptoms make it not as pleasant.  I personally loved being pregnant, I felt beautiful.  The only discomforts were with my last two babies that they felt really low and uncomfortable, and towards the end the worst hemorrhoids ever.  For some women birth is the easiest thing believe it or not, and for others it is quite a challenge.  All 3 of my births were a totally different experience, but Thank God all positive.  I have a very high pain tolerance, and opted for a drug free vaginal birth, and I feel blessed that everything went according to my wishes, Thank You God.  With my first two I had an amazing doula that helped me disconnect from the world, I trusted her completely, and just focus inward on my breath and staying calm and present.  With Eli Tzvi my contractions lasted 12 hours at home, we walked around the block at 5 in the morning so they would progress, my water broke, luckily the hospital is 10 minutes away, I came in at 8 cm and gave birth 2 hours later.  It was an interesting experience because I got so good at breathing through the contractions, that I didn't realize that in the last stages of active labor, they are your signal to get the baby out.  He was 8 pounds and 15 ounces and 23 inches long, I just did not logically understand how to tell my body to push him out.  I really wanted to be a Yoga girl and do it in a squat, and my amazing doctor finally said, ok Yulia, please lets get the baby out now.  It took time to heal, and he was a cryer, and still is a super intense and independent personality today, that will serve him later in life. 

So some women have great pregnancies and great births, but after the baby is born situations come up.  I have had a situation with each baby,Thank God everything turned out fine and the babies got checked and have never had to go back.  That is why I like to labor at home, but give birth in the hospital, just a bit of reality and caution for the just in case.  I did not want to stress from the house to the hospital.  Eli Tzvi had a condition called Pyloric Stenosis, Ziona Sofia came so fast into the world, all the fluid did not come out of her lungs, and Matisyahu was 5 weeks early, but thank god almost 6 pounds and doing great.

With my daughter my labor started at 5:40am at home, doula came over, and we rushed to the hospital, gave birth at 7:18am!  Matisyahu decided to save me a month of discomfort of pregnancy, came in at a healthy weight, and is still taking care of mama, he doesn't cry, he just stretches and kvetches :)  Only to eat, change a diaper, or just for some love.

This mommy brain where we forget details of pregnancy, birth, and our children is probably natures way of keeping us in the moment, and missing the baby years, and to keep on reproducing.  It's all a miracle, and women are miracle, and how it all pops back is a miracle, feeling truly blessed.

Our purpose in this world is to Create and Reproduce, whether it's children to bring light or beautiful contributions to our world, such as building community, art, teaching, inspiring,  we are here to learn and grow.

Coach Yulia